Men Are Trash: Don’t fight it

Now let’s not get things twisted. Before engaging in topics that have to do with social injustices and significant movements, make sure that your remark or opinion is an informed one! We really couldn’t care less about your opinion if you don’t take the time to understand and educate yourself first.

With that out of the way, women in South Africa are tired. We are fed up with how we are still marginalized within society. Our beloved country is set up in a wicked, outdated system of patriarchy. A system that has bred societies where women fear men. A system that has bred societies where even MEN themselves fear men.

I would casually ask the women in my life, who they felt had much more security within society and the majority of them often felt that men have it easy in life. They felt that women are essentially at the bottom of the patriarchal food chain. And when I asked the men in my life the same question, their responses were generally mixed but maintained that it was difficult being a man. So each group had opposing views.

After experiencing 23 years of the so called democracy, ideologies of feminism have become popular within the country and as a result, women are in the process of liberating themselves from the financial and social shackles they were once tied up in. But are they truly free? Is there truly equality between the sexes? NO.

#MenAreTrash is a movement that symbolizes how upset women are with the way they have to live their daily lives in constant fear of being harassed at the taxi rank. With constant skepticism when they are walking alone in the street. Women are constantly told that they should “rather stay home” or that they should be “vigilant” when out of the house. A lot of women base the routes they take home on how safe the environment may seem. We are being policed into what is deemed appropriate for a woman to wear in order for her not to get raped or anything terrible like that. On the other hand men don’t have to be vigilant or careful. In fact men can do whatever the hell they want to do, whenever they want to do it, without the fear of being violated in any way.

The murder of Karabo Mokoena has sparked anger and disappointment directed at men. That men have failed women in so many ways. That men are the reason women can’t live as freely as they wish. Men literally had one responsibility; to maintain peace. And they failed at it.

We have come to terms with why the movement has started and have also recognized the reasons behind the movement. But the missing link to it all, is the solution.

How can the killing sprees, the human trafficking, domestic abuse, emotional abuse and the raping come to a complete end?

Personally when I hear of tragic stories of why #MenAreTrash I feel a sense of helplessness because I don’t know how to start making my community better for women. South Africans are crying, we are in mourning. Our women are living in constant fear at the hands of men. Why are our men so angry?

My one desire is for the patriarchal systems to be eradicated. That equality between the sexes may be a norm. BUT until that happens, #MenAreTrash!! 

by Buhle


  1. Reply
    Ms Ireen says

    Totally agree. Well put, I wouldn’t have said it any better.

  2. Reply
    Buhle Ngcobo says

    Mindset is a major part of the problem. Maybe in future, more parents will raise their sons in ways that aren’t rooted in patriarchy. Maybe.

  3. Reply
    Thandeka Ngcobo says

    Well said Buhle. The missing link is really the solution.

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